25 Golf Jokes: Golf Puns,
Pick Up Lines, & Dad Jokes

Funny golf puns make waiting for your golf turn more enjoyable. Read below for the 25 best golf jokes that are sure to make your friends chuckle.

Golf Puns

  • 1. Why did the golfer bring an extra pair of pants? In case he got a hole in one.
  • 2. Why was the golfer always calm during a round of golf? He had a steady hand.
  • 3. Why did the golfer carry a spare umbrella? In case of a “fore” cast.
  • 4. What do you call a golfer who always takes the easy way out? A “short-cutter.”
  • 5. Why did the golfer bring a ladder to the course? To reach new heights in his performance.
  • 6. How many golfers does it take to change a lightbulb? Fore!
  • 7. What is a golfer’s worst nightmare? The Bogeyman.
  • 8. Are you a scratch golfer? I know I am because every time I hit the ball, I scratch my head wondering where on Earth it went.
  • 9. Bad at golf? Join the club.
  • 10. Where can you find a golfer on a Friday night? Clubbing.
  • 11. What does a golfer’s diet consist of? A lot of greens and water.
  • 12. What is a golfer’s favorite dance move? The bogey.

Golf Pick Up Lines

  • 1. Are you a fairway? Because you’re looking like the perfect path to my heart.
  • 2. Are you a golfer? Because you’re making my heart swing.
  • 3. I’m no professional, but meeting you makes me a major winner.
  • 4. Would you mind checking my scorecard for me? It seems like I am missing a number – yours.
  • 5. Are you looking for the fairway? Because letting me take you to dinner is the only fair way this evening can go.

Golf Stand-Up

If you haven't heard of Nate Bargatze, he's one of the best comedians out there, and you need to give him a listen. Check out his standup material on golfing!

More Golf Jokes

  • 1. How can you tell a golfer is really bad? He always has a spare scorecard.
  • 2. What’s the difference between a golfer and a skydiver? A skydiver has a better chance of landing on the fairway.
  • 3. I shot one under at golf today. One under a tree, one under a bush, and one under the water.
  • 4. Golf is harder than baseball because you still have to play your foul balls.
  • 5. Why do golf announcers whisper? Because they don’t want to wake up the people watching.
  • 6. In golf, people tend to get their numbers mixed up. They shoot a “six,” yell “fore,” and write “five.”
  • 7. I’m so bad at golf that I have to go get my ball retriever re-gripped more often than my clubs.
  • 8. Golf is an easy game. It’s just hard to play.

Impress your friends with these epic golf puns and jokes the next time you go golfing.